The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
I wish you could order shots online.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
