I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
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