Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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