i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
