hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
