: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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