Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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