quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize