If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Randomize
