But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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