Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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