The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
