dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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