Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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