I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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