And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
