What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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