no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
