i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I think i got beer on your cat.
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