god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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