your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize