guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
