Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
