i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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