Your face is a jimmy john
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
