Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
