Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
