i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
they're like a gay fantastic four
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
