There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
