Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
