Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
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