Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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