I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
