her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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