For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
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