hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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