oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
