im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Randomize
