This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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