Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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