You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize