I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
