It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
