really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
