She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize