office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
