handjob tips. give me some.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I don't deserve a penis
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
