so explain again why im purple
no
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
