Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
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