I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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